I can’t just decide to not be anxious. I’ve tried it and tried it and it doesn’t work. Low anxiety is not a decision it’s an outcome. I allow myself to be bombarded with continuous messages of activity, excitement, fear, concern, care …. and when there are gaps I fill them up with more [...]
Filed under: Uncategorized on October 27th, 2010 | No Comments »
My headspace these days is full up. I fill it continuously with hopes and dreams and fears and concerns. Whatever it is I always fill my headspace up right to the limit. When is there room for actually living this life I’m forever thinking about.
And then I break out, walk the dog, stare at the [...]
Filed under: Uncategorized on October 23rd, 2010 | No Comments »
We are still on the subject of finding sanctuary, the place where we know we are really alive.
Leaning in and listening and choosing to follow what you find is the essence of obedience. However my experience tells me that I must learn to lean in and listen to myself. The moment by moment experience of [...]
Filed under: Uncategorized on October 22nd, 2010 | No Comments »
A strange thing is I’m noticing my constancy. Or rather gaps in my constancy. When I am constant in love to those dear to me I notice that affection flows from me easily. When I am less constant in love I notice irritation. The strange thing is that the response from them to me alters [...]
Filed under: Uncategorized on October 18th, 2010 | No Comments »
I am finding that when I would like authentic, true intimacy in relationship I can’t just shoot for intimacy. Intimacy is a result, an effect, a destination, a fulfillment. It seems to me that intimacy comes from affection and when affection is honestly and faithfully given then intimacy flowers.
But then I see the contriving use [...]
Filed under: Uncategorized on October 15th, 2010 | No Comments »
Finding Sanctuary and losing it.
Having a few strange days. Some of the time I’m just bouncing from one thing to another, snatching at doing things and thinking about things for very short periods. It’s very stressful and builds anxiety. In desperation I’m having times of breaking out of this and leaning in to hear what [...]
Filed under: Uncategorized on October 14th, 2010 | No Comments »
finding sanctuary ….. Understanding the meaning of the word obedience
latin ….. oboedire
- ob = towards; oedire = “to hear” … :
to lean towards sufficiently to hear and then follow by choice.
So obedience was never doing what you are told to do, that would be blind obedience.
The word obedience [...]
Filed under: Uncategorized on October 13th, 2010 | No Comments »
Finding Sanctuary …… a question of freedom
question
When a young person smokes due to culture pressure is it an act of freedom …
question
When branded goods become an essential to our identity.. is this an act of freedom.
question
When we persistently choose all sorts of things to bring satisfaction or relief is this an act of [...]
Filed under: Uncategorized on October 11th, 2010 | No Comments »
Finding Sanctuary … the ladder of humility … you climb down it and live
1. having a sense of wonder about the gift of life
2. saying no to our instinctive self … a space between what I want and how I act
3. saying yes to other ways as an expression of freedom …. submitting to community
4. [...]
Filed under: Uncategorized on October 9th, 2010 | No Comments »
You don’t have to be good to be authentic. You could be authentically bad. Authentic means you are what you say you are. It means you are no more and no less than you are. It means you are in public what you are in private, which to be honest we can’t always afford to [...]
Filed under: Uncategorized on October 8th, 2010 | No Comments »